{"id":45261,"date":"2019-03-28T16:00:11","date_gmt":"2019-03-28T16:00:11","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.musical-u.com\/?p=45261\/"},"modified":"2024-05-10T09:55:49","modified_gmt":"2024-05-10T09:55:49","slug":"when-to-stick-with-it-and-when-to-move-on","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.musical-u.com\/learn\/when-to-stick-with-it-and-when-to-move-on\/","title":{"rendered":"When to stick with it &#8211; and when to move on"},"content":{"rendered":"<div class=\"postLeadIn\">\n<p><span class=\"postLeadIn\">Learning music can sometimes be frustrating. It can feel like you\u2019re putting in a ton of effort with very little results to show for it. <\/span><\/p>\n<p>But at the same time we all know that persistence is the key to success.<\/p>\n<p>So how do you know when you\u2019re being virtuous for persisting &#8211; and when you\u2019re just bashing your head against a brick wall?<\/p>\n<p>How do you know whether to give up or stick with it?<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<p>Listen to the episode:<\/p>\n<p><iframe width=\"1080\" height=\"608\" src=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/r91jtDzyRV4?feature=oembed\" frameborder=\"0\" allow=\"accelerometer; autoplay; encrypted-media; gyroscope; picture-in-picture\" allowfullscreen><\/iframe><\/p>\n<div class='mu_podcast_embed'><iframe style='border: none' src='\/\/html5-player.libsyn.com\/embed\/episode\/id\/9166529\/height\/90\/width\/640\/theme\/custom\/autonext\/no\/thumbnail\/yes\/autoplay\/no\/preload\/no\/no_addthis\/no\/direction\/backward\/render-playlist\/no\/custom-color\/59638c\/' height='90' width='640' scrolling='no'  allowfullscreen webkitallowfullscreen mozallowfullscreen oallowfullscreen msallowfullscreen><\/iframe><\/div>\n<p class=\"shownotes_cu_optin\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-45257\" style=\"max-width: 256px; height: auto;\" src=\"https:\/\/www.musical-u.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/03\/Download-Should-I-Stick-With-It-Cheat-Sheet.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"512\" height=\"577\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.musical-u.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/03\/Download-Should-I-Stick-With-It-Cheat-Sheet.jpg 512w, https:\/\/www.musical-u.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/03\/Download-Should-I-Stick-With-It-Cheat-Sheet-266x300.jpg 266w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 512px) 100vw, 512px\" \/><br \/>\nGet The Free &#8220;Should I Stick With It?&#8221; Cheat Sheet<br \/>\n<a class=\"cta_button green\" href=\"https:\/\/secure.musical-u.com\/optin_box\/pl8ecbd5bnhs3n72\" data-delay=\"0\" data-exit=\"false\"><i class=\"fa fa-download\"><\/i> Download Now!<\/a><script src='https:\/\/www.clickfunnels.com\/assets\/cfpop.js' type='text\/javascript'><\/script><\/p>\n<div class='podcast_subscribe_buttons'><p class='subscribe_cta'>Subscribe For Future Episodes!<\/p>\n    <div class='buttons'><a href='http:\/\/musicalitynow.com\/subscribeitunes' target='_blank' class='label' onclick='logPodSubscribe(\"apple\");'><i class='fa fa-apple' aria-hidden='true'><\/i> Apple Podcasts<\/a><span class='separator'> | <\/span><a href='http:\/\/musicalitynow.com\/subscribeandroid' target='_blank' class='label' onclick='logPodSubscribe(\"android\");'><i class='fa fa-android' aria-hidden='true'><\/i> Android<\/a><span class='separator'> | <\/span><a href='http:\/\/musicalitynow.com\/subscribeyoutube' target='_blank' class='label' onclick='logPodSubscribe(\"youtube\");'><i class='fa fa-youtube' aria-hidden='true'><\/i> YouTube<\/a><span class='separator'> | <\/span><a href='http:\/\/musicalitynow.com\/subscribegplay' target='_blank' class='label' onclick='logPodSubscribe(\"gplay\");'><i class='fa fa-google' aria-hidden='true'><\/i> Google Play<\/a><span class='separator'> | <\/span><a href='http:\/\/musicalitynow.com\/subscribestitcher' target='_blank' class='label' onclick='logPodSubscribe(\"stitcher\");'><img src='https:\/\/www.musical-u.com\/wp-content\/themes\/Divi-MU\/img\/Stitcher-icon.png' alt='Stitcher' class='podcast_icon'>Stitcher<\/a><span class='separator'> | <\/span><a href='http:\/\/musicalitynow.com\/subscriberss' target='_blank' class='label' onclick='logPodSubscribe(\"rss\");'><i class='fa fa-rss' aria-hidden='true'><\/i> RSS<\/a><\/div>\n    <p class='review_cta'>Enjoying the show? Please consider <a href='https:\/\/www.musical-u.com\/podcast-review\/' target='_blank' onclick='logPodReview();'>rating and reviewing it!<\/a><\/p>\n    <\/div>\n<h2>Links and Resources<\/h2>\n<ul class=\"shownotes_links\">\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.musical-u.com\/learn\/time-break-music\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Is it time to &#8220;break up&#8221; with music?<\/a><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<div class='podcast_review_cta'><p class='review_cta'>Enjoying Musicality Now? Please support the show by rating and reviewing it!<\/p>\n    <p class='review_button'><a class='cta_button' href='https:\/\/www.musical-u.com\/podcast-review\/' target='_blank' onclick='logPodReview();'>Rate and Review!<\/a><\/p>\n    <\/div><!-- MU Podcast Schema -->\n<div class='mu_podcast_schema' itemscope itemtype='https:\/\/schema.org\/PodcastEpisode'>\n <div style='display:none;'>\n  <a itemprop='url' href='https:\/\/www.musical-u.com\/learn\/when-to-stick-with-it-and-when-to-move-on\/'>\n       <span itemprop='name'>When to stick with it &#8211; and when to move on<\/span>\n  <\/a>\n  <div itemprop='datePublished' datetime= '2019-03-28T16:00:11+00:00'>2019-03-28T16:00:11+00:00<\/div>\n  <div itemprop='description'>The musician's conundrum: should you stick with learning that difficult and frustrating thing, or leave it and move on? We explore a nuanced answer.<\/div>\n    <div itemprop='associatedMedia' itemscope itemtype='https:\/\/schema.org\/MediaObject'>\n      <div itemprop='image' href= 'https:\/\/www.musical-u.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/03\/TMP166-When-to-stick-with-it-and-when-to-move-on.jpg'>https:\/\/www.musical-u.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/03\/TMP166-When-to-stick-with-it-and-when-to-move-on.jpg<\/div>\n   <\/div>\n <\/div>\n<h2>Transcript<\/h2><div class='mu_podcast_transcript'>\n        <div id='mu_podcast_transcript-link-45261' aria-expanded='false' class='sh_link sh_hide'><a class='cta_button mu_podcast_transcript_showhide_link' href='#' onclick=\"showhide_toggle('mu_podcast_transcript',45261,'Show Transcript','Hide Transcript');return false;\"><span id='mu_podcast_transcript-toggle-45261'>Show Transcript<\/span><\/a><\/div><div id='mu_podcast_transcript-content-45261' class='sh-content sh-hide' style='display:none;'>\n        <div itemprop='audio' itemscope itemtype='https:\/\/schema.org\/AudioObject'>\n          <div itemprop='transcript'>\n           \n<p><!--more--><\/p>\n<p>In the last video we tackled the question: Is it time to break up with music?<\/p>\n<p>We talked about how you need to get specific about what\u2019s bugging you and making you feel frustrated or disappointed. That it might be one specific skill or topic &#8211; or it might be planning, that the work you\u2019re doing isn\u2019t clearly aligned with the goal you\u2019re striving to reach.<\/p>\n<p>In both cases it can be helpful to have guidance on \u201cHow long should you stick with it?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Because being determined is good and can help you get through the hard work required to learn challenging skills. But taken too far it can lead to losing motivation, getting frustrated and putting in a lot of effort for negligible results.<\/p>\n<p>It\u2019s a bit like playing poker: you don\u2019t have to play every hand &#8211; and sometimes you get into a hand and then realise partway through that you should fold. Folding isn\u2019t giving up, it\u2019s the smart move to help you win the overall game.<\/p>\n<p>So how do you make that decision? As Kenny Rogers put it, how do you \u201cknow when to hold \u2018em &#8211; and know when to fold \u2018em\u201d?<\/p>\n<p>So the first thing to say is: It\u2019s okay to fold. Or specifically for music learning, it\u2019s okay to adjust course.<\/p>\n<p>One of the beautiful things about learning music is that it&#8217;s not a strict straight line you must follow. Very often when we&#8217;re stuck on one thing, we can go spend some time on something else and when we come back we find that thing which was hard is suddenly much easier. So often you can safely put something aside without worrying that you&#8217;re abandoning it or giving up &#8211; you&#8217;re just taking a pause on that particular thing to help you keep moving forwards overall.<\/p>\n<p>This question came up in a Musical U Members Q&amp;A one time and we turned it into a \u201ctips\u201d discussion inside the site specifically to help answer the question: \u201cHow long should I stick with it?\u201d when a member\u2019s been working on a particular module &#8211; say, interval recognition &#8211; and feels like they\u2019re stuck.<\/p>\n<p>What we recommend is to ask that question on three different timescales: weeks, months and years.<\/p>\n<p>With something specific, like distinguishing major from minor harmonic third intervals, we tend to recommend a week as the timescale to have in mind. So, if you\u2019ve been doing exactly the same thing for a week and you\u2019re not seeing any improvement, it\u2019s time to make a change.<\/p>\n<p>Typically, there are going to be small adjustments you can make. So in the case of intervals, there are going to be tips and tricks, or different ways to approach it, different avenues in to let your ear tune in to what it needs to hear. In Musical U we have lots of \u201ctips\u201d discussions to suggest things to try and of course the team is always on hand to help.<\/p>\n<p>If you\u2019ve been at it for a week and not making progress, the first thing to do is to recognize that. To not get discouraged (because a week is not that long!) and there are things you can do. But then it\u2019s to find small adjustments you can make, maybe new insights, new tips, new methods you can use to tackle that same problem in a different way. So try the same thing from a different angle.<\/p>\n<p>After you\u2019ve done that a few times or after you\u2019ve run out of tips or tricks you need to take a step back and think about it in the bigger picture.<\/p>\n<p>The medium timescale is months.<\/p>\n<p>If for example, you\u2019ve tried a bunch of different methods for cracking these major and minor harmonic thirds or you\u2019ve tried a bunch of different strategies for learning the same 1-4-5 chord progressions and a month has passed, and you\u2019re still not feeling like you\u2019re getting it then it\u2019s time to make a change to your plan.<\/p>\n<p>In the case of those major and minor thirds, we\u2019d probably recommend moving on to a different interval or a different combination of intervals. That\u2019s something you might like to do even after just ten days or so because the wonderful thing about your training, in general, is something you do in one area can have a surprising knock-on effect in another area. That\u2019s particularly true with intervals and chords and chord progressions where you\u2019re developing your core sense of relative pitch throughout.<\/p>\n<p>Which means, yes you might be focused on major and minor thirds at the moment, but if you wander off and you spend a bit of time on say, triads or chord progressions, it\u2019s surprising then when you return to those major and minor thirds how you might have progressed without specifically studying those in the meantime.<\/p>\n<p>It\u2019s important to know this is never a \u201ccop-out\u201d \u2013 it\u2019s never \u201cgiving up\u201d to move on to something else.<\/p>\n<p>If you\u2019ve been at the same thing for a few weeks and you\u2019ve tried a bunch of different approaches, don\u2019t be afraid or ashamed to move on to a different area. It\u2019s not a failure in any case on your part. It\u2019s simply giving your ears and brain a break and feeding them a different area to study before you come back and revisit that thing you were stuck on.<\/p>\n<p>Spend a week, then try some different techniques. If that\u2019s still not helping after a few weeks, adjust your plan. Again, at that point often a member will use their Progress Journal to get guidance from the team to know what to change.<\/p>\n<p>Finally, the largest timescale. We almost never see people get to this stage in Musical U or in general, but it\u2019s always at the back of your mind: \u201cShould I give up completely?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>This feels like such an admission of failure and it feels so emotional to even consider it. But we have to be upfront about it and say, \u201cYou know, this is what we\u2019re always worrying about.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>We\u2019ve already talked about this a bit, but if you are not making progress on the small stuff and you\u2019ve tried a few changes and even on the course of a month or two, you feel like you\u2019re not making progress naturally you\u2019re going to start to wonder, \u201cIs there something wrong here? Am I ever going to crack this?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>There are two things to know.<\/p>\n<p>The first is: definitely don\u2019t give up! Everyone is capable of learning these skills and we all move at different paces and we all need different routes.<\/p>\n<p>Again it\u2019s not a failure on your part if you\u2019re not seeing the progress you wanted to. As long as you\u2019ve been putting in the work and you\u2019ve been staying conscious of how it\u2019s going and asking yourself these kinds of questions about whether it\u2019s time to make a change. You\u2019ve done your part and you have to trust that you\u2019re moving at your own pace and you will get there.<\/p>\n<p>I can say that confidently because we\u2019ve seen so many people at Musical U who do feel like they\u2019re struggling or like they\u2019ve not made any progress for months, and then finally they find the approach that works. And they do crack it, and they do have the success they were hoping for.<\/p>\n<p>The second thing is: this is where it\u2019s vital to be part of a community. It\u2019s easy to bury yourself in a room or by yourself, study hard, feel like you\u2019re making progress. And then when you\u2019re not making progress, you feel very alone and very isolated. That\u2019s when it\u2019s easy to say \u201cI\u2019m just not up to this, I can\u2019t do it, I\u2019m going to give up.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>This is why we emphasise community so much at Musical U. It\u2019s not about social chit-chat. It\u2019s because at that moment, when you\u2019re worrying, when you\u2019re doubting yourself, that\u2019s when you need people around you to say, \u201cLook how far you\u2019ve come already, look at the things you\u2019ve been able to do so far. Look at these other people who\u2019ve struggled with the same things and then persevered and succeeded.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>And just to offer that advice and support and guidance, that\u2019s what the community is here for at Musical U, and in particular what the team is here for.<\/p>\n<p>So, if you can bring yourself to admit that you\u2019re having that difficulty, and you can bring yourself to reach out and even if you don\u2019t ask for help just to share where you\u2019re at. That\u2019s when the community can step in and help you \u2013 both in a general way in terms of offering support and guidance, and in a very constructive specific, practical way by saying, \u201cHey here are three other things you could try.\u201d Or, \u201chere\u2019s something you can adjust about your training plan that\u2019s going to really help you move forwards.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>So to recap: we\u2019ve gone from small to medium to big timescale.<\/p>\n<p>Small-scale, a week or two: add some new tips and techniques<\/p>\n<p>Medium-scale: a month or so: if you\u2019re still not cracking that one specific thing, time to adjust your plan and move on to a different area for a while.<\/p>\n<p>The big picture: if you reach that point of feeling like you\u2019re failing overall and you\u2019re not going to get there overall, that\u2019s when you need to reach out to your musical community and just share what\u2019s happening. We\u2019ve all been there, we can relate to you. We know what\u2019s going on, you don\u2019t need to feel sheepish about it. Say, \u201cLook I\u2019m at breaking point, I\u2019m feeling like giving up,\u201d and there\u2019s no doubt we\u2019ll be able to help you get your mindset back on track and come up with some practical ways you can take steps forward, whatever stage you\u2019ve reached.<\/p>\n<p>If you start using this mental model for the three timescales of music learning, and the tips I\u2019ve given here for each, then the question \u201cShould I stick with it?\u201d will become a lot easier to answer. And you\u2019ll be able to make Kenny Rogers proud.<\/p>\n<p>If you want a handy cheat sheet to remind you of this process, the perfect thing to print out and keep handy in your music folder or practice space &#8211; just hit the link or visit the shownotes for this episode at musicalitynow.com.<\/p>\n<div class='podcast_subscribe_buttons'><p class='subscribe_cta'>Subscribe For Future Episodes!<\/p>\n    <div class='buttons'><a href='http:\/\/musicalitynow.com\/subscribeitunes' target='_blank' class='label' onclick='logPodSubscribe(\"apple\");'><i class='fa fa-apple' aria-hidden='true'><\/i> Apple Podcasts<\/a><span class='separator'> | <\/span><a href='http:\/\/musicalitynow.com\/subscribeandroid' target='_blank' class='label' onclick='logPodSubscribe(\"android\");'><i class='fa fa-android' aria-hidden='true'><\/i> Android<\/a><span class='separator'> | <\/span><a href='http:\/\/musicalitynow.com\/subscribeyoutube' target='_blank' class='label' onclick='logPodSubscribe(\"youtube\");'><i class='fa fa-youtube' aria-hidden='true'><\/i> YouTube<\/a><span class='separator'> | <\/span><a href='http:\/\/musicalitynow.com\/subscribegplay' target='_blank' class='label' onclick='logPodSubscribe(\"gplay\");'><i class='fa fa-google' aria-hidden='true'><\/i> Google Play<\/a><span class='separator'> | <\/span><a href='http:\/\/musicalitynow.com\/subscribestitcher' target='_blank' class='label' onclick='logPodSubscribe(\"stitcher\");'><img src='https:\/\/www.musical-u.com\/wp-content\/themes\/Divi-MU\/img\/Stitcher-icon.png' alt='Stitcher' class='podcast_icon'>Stitcher<\/a><span class='separator'> | <\/span><a href='http:\/\/musicalitynow.com\/subscriberss' target='_blank' class='label' onclick='logPodSubscribe(\"rss\");'><i class='fa fa-rss' aria-hidden='true'><\/i> RSS<\/a><\/div>\n    <p class='review_cta'>Enjoying the show? Please consider <a href='https:\/\/www.musical-u.com\/podcast-review\/' target='_blank' onclick='logPodReview();'>rating and reviewing it!<\/a><\/p>\n    <\/div>\n\n          <\/div>\n        <\/div>\n        <\/div><\/div><\/div>\n<!-- \/MU Podcast Schema -->","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>The musician&#8217;s conundrum: should you stick with learning that difficult and frustrating thing, or leave it and move on? We explore a nuanced answer.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":11,"featured_media":45263,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_et_pb_use_builder":"","_et_pb_old_content":"","_et_gb_content_width":"","_ml_titleColor":"#000000","_ml_titleFont":"Roboto","_ml_titleFontSize":1.136,"_ml_titleFontWeight":"400","_ml_titleLineHeight":1.3,"_ml_metaColor":"#708090","_ml_metaFont":"Montserrat","_ml_metaFontSize":0.6785,"_ml_metaFontWeight":"400","_ml_metaLineHeight":0.92,"_ml_bodyColor":"#a9a9a9","_ml_bodyFont":"Open Sans","_ml_bodyFontSize":0.85,"_ml_bodyFontWeight":"400","_ml_bodyLineHeight":1.2,"_ml_wooPriceColor":"#666","_ml_wooPriceFont":"Open Sans","_ml_wooPriceFontSize":0.9,"_ml_wooPriceFontWeight":"400","_ml_wooPriceLineHeight":1.27,"_ml_headingColor":"#000","_ml_headingFont":"Merriweather","_ml_headingFontSize":2.02,"_ml_headingFontWeight":"700","_ml_headingLineHeight":1.47,"_mlglobal_userfontcolors":{"headingColorUser":[],"titleColorUser":[],"metaColorUser":[],"bodyColorUser":[],"wooPriceColorUser":[]},"footnotes":""},"categories":[755,634,752,11],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-45261","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-mindset","category-make-plans-set-goals","category-podcast","category-practice-music"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v26.5 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>When to stick with it - and when to move on - Musical U<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"The musician&#039;s conundrum: should you stick with learning that difficult and frustrating thing, or leave it and move on? 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